Locker Room Lawyer, Episode 13: Arian Foster vs. a wolf
Domonique Foxworth and Clinton Yates discuss whether the former NFL running back could actually beat a wolf in a fight
7:42 AMIn this week’s edition of Locker Room Lawyer, Clinton Yates and Domonique Foxworth take the case of former NFL running back Arian Foster to The Undefeated courtroom.
Foster recently took to Twitter to explain that he wanted to go camping, but wouldn’t because he’s afraid of “wildlife.” There is, however, one animal Foster doesn’t seem to be scared of:
i honestly think i can get a wolf 1 on 1 tho.
— feeno (@ArianFoster) March 5, 2017
Yes, that’s right, the four-time Pro Bowler believes that in a one-on-one fight he could, in fact, defeat a wolf. Our Locker Room Lawyer Domonique thinks so, too, citing Foster’s size advantage and ability to make quick decisions while running the football as reasons that he would prevail over a wolf.
Clinton and the International Wolf Center disagree. In their opinion, ain’t no way a man can beat an animal that possesses an instinctive ability to kill.
What do you think: Could Foster really win in a fight against a wolf?
Check out the video, and if you have any professional athlete in mind (past or present) who needs the Locker Room Lawyer’s representation, feel free to email us at email@example.com with episode ideas. Also, check out our weekly All Day Podcast, as well as Domonique and Clinton every Sunday on The Morning Roast.
Daily Dose: 3/7/17
Ben Carson, get your life
2:30 PMSince all I do these days is talk for a living, here’s another podcast that I appeared on, this time to discuss the movie Get Out, which is the best film I’ve seen in a year. The gang over at True Hoop really is a fun one.
Speaking of which, Ben Carson: GET OUT. We have no clue what’s going on with the man who was once revered in the black community, but on Monday, the man tapped to be the head of the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development stood on a stage and compared slaves to immigrants, which is just not OK on any level. Seriously, he basically completely whitewashed the concept of indentured servitude to make it seem like something in line with the concept of the American dream. Homey needs to get out of the sunken place.
We really loved Bill Paxton. The actor who passed a couple of weeks ago was one of those guys who you didn’t necessarily know by name, but always recognized him and the often-trusted characters he played on screen. Personally, my favorite role of his was in Twister. His death shocked a lot of Hollywood, as he was only 61 years old and generally a well-liked person. As it turns out, he had a heart defect and died after undergoing surgery to work on the problem. Very sad.
Arian Foster has apparently lost his mind. The former Houston Texans and Miami Dolphins running back wants to go camping but is apparently afraid of wildlife. Except for wolves. Foster thinks he can take on a wolf one-on-one, and his logic is hilariously idiotic. He believes that because he can read and because he has thumbs that he can tango with an actual wild animal if pressed. Hubris is an incredible thing. It’d be one thing if he said that he could survive a wolf attack, but no, he actually feels like this matchup favors him. The International Wolf Center disagrees.
Isaiah Thomas might be the smartest player in the NBA. Not in terms of book smarts or quick wit necessarily, but at his height, you’ve got to be pretty sneaky and efficient to be such an effective player. Whatever he’s listed at heightwise, I guarantee he’s shorter. If you’ve stood next to him, you’d know that. He’s at best as tall as I am, and your boy ain’t particularly large. However, due to said drawback, he’s learned to use his diminutive status to his advantage with one thing that doesn’t change: the rim.
Coffee Break: We’ve now grown accustomed to women wearing hijabs while competing in sports, which is a good thing. There are still the mouth breathers of the world who recoil at the sight, but now Nike is further normalizing the practice with the creation of a performance hijab.
Snack Time: You know how we feel about street art around here. You need to check out this extremely early documentary about the graffiti game, which might be the first of its kind ever made.
Dessert: Jay Z keeps doing it big. Scared money don’t make none, I guess.
Daily Dose: 3/6/17
Floyd Mayweather Jr. has enemies across the pond
4:00 PMThe radio keeps calling, so we keep answering. On Sunday, The Morning Roast got off as usual, and this morning, we filled in for The Dan Le Batard Show. Here’s Sunday. Here’s today. People hated us, which is a good thing.
This travel ban refuses to go away. The White House has retooled this effort as a way to tear apart families under the guise of keeping people safe. Still not sure I understand that logic considering that most of the threats to the people of this nation very much come from inside our own borders, but whatever. In the new deal, Iraq is cut out from the other nations that will trigger scrutiny from TSA, but fundamentally, the idea is still there. Meanwhile, immigrants are being shot left and right for reasons we don’t know.
So, recently we found some new planets. Like, for real, they located a bunch of new places that might actually be habitable to humans, some 40 light years away. If I’m being honest, I don’t really understand space. I don’t particularly get how we can legitimately send people to other planets, like, say, Mars. And once I start contemplating what the concept of it is, I get really nervous thinking about the gravity of what is the great beyond. Check out this creepy story about what will happen to us if we actually get to Mars.
Finally, we’re coming to an end. The season finale of The Bachelor is tonight, and it couldn’t be coming a minute sooner. Nick Viall got rid of Corinne, which means she got as far as she needed to in order to get famous, but also didn’t have to deal with the awkwardness of the fantasy suite. Now, we’re looking at either Raven or Vanessa, since, although she’s still on the show, we know that Rachel is The Bachelorette. There’s also that small matter of Raven’s sex life. Should be fun, plus the women tell all.
There are some easy ways to know when someone doesn’t like you. No. 1 on the list is when the person says, ‘I don’t like you.’ No. 2 is when the person does something wildly disrespectful to you, and shows little to no remorse even after he or she knows your feelings have been hurt. Then, there’s the third level, which involves going to lengths to destroy one’s personal items as a way to send a message, a la Angela Bassett in Waiting To Exhale. Someone set Floyd Mayweather Jr.’s car on fire in England, which is pretty dang terrifying.
Coffee Break: Banksy is known for his elaborate pranks and political demonstrations in the form of art, but this latest one on the West Bank in Bethlehem, Palestine, is really something. It’s a hotel that boasts the worst view in the world, which is really quite depressing on multiple levels.
Snack Time: We literally have zero idea of what Michael Jordan is talking about here, but anytime you say something this ridiculous, we’re going to laugh. Sorry, MJ.
Dessert: If you still haven’t seen Get Out, go do it. Hopefully your experience won’t be as bad as this one.
Daily Dose: 3/3/17
Congratulations, you played yourself
2:12 PMAll right, kiddos. Big weekend for the radio squad, if for no other reason than that it portends a big week. We’re doing the show on Sunday per usual, then filling in for Dan Le Batard on Monday. Then Bomani Jones on Thursday and Friday.
The man accused of making threats against Jewish facilities is a former journalist. He’s also a wacko creepstick who decided he was going to make all sorts of dangerous remarks to scare people and get the attention of a woman who had spurned his attention. Dudes are the absolute worst. If you don’t remember, he’s the guy who worked for The Intercept, and thought it was a good idea to make up a source regarding the whole Dylann Roof situation, which was also extremely harmful. Here are the details.
Cincinnati’s Zoo needs some good news. They’re the ones who killed Harambe, setting off an international firestorm over a gorilla that some say was trying to protect a child that fell into its enclosure. If you’re not familiar with Harambe, where on earth have you been? But should we let one extremely unfortunate incident affect the entire reputation of one zoo? Probably, yeah. But now, they’re doing something good. There’s a hippo that was prematurely born there, who is now thriving courtesy of their lovely people. She’s so adorable.
Admitting you got played is not easy. Letting the world know that you put yourself out there, only to be taken advantage of is a difficult thing to do because to some, it admits weakness. But it can be necessary in order to let the rest of us know who’s looking to treat people like that. So, when you saw all those presidents of historically black colleges and universities in the Oval Office for what they thought was going to be something significant, well, you know what happened next. At least Morehouse’s president had it in him to say it openly.
The Los Angeles Rams have serious identity issues. But for now, they’re going back to the white-horned helmets, harkening back to the days of the Fearsome Foursome, which was pre-color TV for the most part. But they’re still holding on to the gold trim of the St. Louis days, which I don’t understand. Why bother? Save some money on the jerseys? Either way, once they get a new stadium, they’ll probably switch up the unis again, which could be great if they ditch the gold entirely. We’ll see. For now, this is what we’ve got.
Coffee Break: Condoms are superimportant. Between protecting against sexually transmitted diseases and infections, never mind preventing pregnancy, they’re a hugely important part of public health. And a new company is looking to keep the public part about that alive. Behold, a rubber that’s also a FitBit, in case you need that info.
Snack Time: I don’t know what SXSW is thinking, but they’re about to seriously ruin their already altered brand by apparently threatening artists if they do nonfestival sponsored events this year. Not cool, y’all.
Dessert: Behold. The greatest basketball coach of all time. Happy weekend, y’all.